Ralph Reed Under Attack From Left-Wing Senators Who Adopt Black Babies!*

Thursday, April 21, 2005

Rumors have it that a subpoena has been issued from the U.S. Senate Committee on Indian Affairs that summons The Messiah, Jr. (who, when donning his street clothes, refers to himself as "Ralph Reed") to appear before the Committee on Indian Affairs to offer an explanation, under oath, of exactly what kind of idiots does he think the senators are to believe that he didn't know Messrs. Jack Abramoff and Michael Scanlon were paying for his services out of casino gambling funds from a competing tribe who hired Abramoff, Scanlon, and Reed to shutdown the competing casino?

Now, if this whole investigation from the Indian Affairs Committee into Ralph Reed's activities doesn't meet the most appropriate definition of irony that you've encountered in the last 5 years, we'll give you a lifetime subscription to The Political Vine. So, here's the ironic part: The senator in charge of this committee is Senator John McCain.

McCain, if you recall, dared to run against some punk, ex-alcoholic, ex-dope user from Austin, Texas in a contest in the year 2000 for the Republican nomination for the office of President of the United States.

Now, Ralph was hired by McCain's opponent. After McCain won the New Hampshire primary, his opponent went ballistic at his loss and Ralph was called-in for a pow-wow with some guy named Karl Rove to figure out how to beat McCain in the upcoming South Carolina presidential primary.

Now, we’re not exactly sure of who wrote the phone script because both Rove and Reed are known to have no boundaries when it comes to running political races. What we do know is that it was Ralph Reed’s company, Century Strategies, that was paid money to set-up a phone bank staffed with callers who called all of the phone numbers of the members of the South Carolina Christian Coalition prior to the SC primary.

The script was on the order of “Would you vote for John McCain if you knew he had a black baby?” Well, the planners knew their mark. They called the heart of WASP Country and delivered that type of information to turn-out the racists in droves to vote against McCain. The rest, they say, is history.

The fact of the matter is that John McCain did, some years ago, adopt what people of Reed’s ilk would refer to as a “colored baby.” It’s not that he had an affair with a black woman, but that he adopted a baby from the Asian region. Some of you might recall that McCain spent a few years being held captive in a North Vietnamese prison, while sh**birds like Ralph were spending his time paging through the Sears Roebuck Catalog, looking at the pictures of the female models who wore bras (“Oh, wow, Mom! Thanks for bringing the catalog with the pictures in color!”)

Anyway, back to the irony, Mr. Reed is due a very, very good grilling by Senator McCain and anyone else who wants to dig into Ralph’s veneer exterior about a whole slew of subjects.

We will be covering SO much more when it comes to Ralph Reed and his activities over the past 12 years…all of his lies, all of his “un-Christian” activities, and we will be exposing his political game plan, blow-by-blow, before it even happens.

Why? Because we have firsthand experience about Ralph and his tactics. In the state chairman's race of 2001, the Ralph Reed camp accused this newsletter, and anyone who wasn't a supporter of his, as being "anti-people of faith", just because we opposed his candidacy.

Mr. Reed is a sleazebag of the highest form who has no qualms about preaching the Bible in one hand while violating it with the other.

When an op-ed piece about the true Ralph Reed gets printed soon in the Atlanta Jewish Times, a local weekly for the Atlanta Jewish community (available at Borders and B & N), we can predict that the Ralph Reed Team will resort to accusing the author of that op-ed as being "anti-Semitic." And, we have no doubt that there will be some in the Jewish community who will buy any manure that comes out of Reed's mouth.

SO, if your stomach cannot take this article, you might want to jump-off the Political Vine at this point…because, it’s going to be a very, very bumpy ride. The truth always is for some people...


*Note: The title of this article is intended to reflect how some knuckleheads like Tom DeLay or Sean Hannity would likely paint this subpoena if they were running the press office of Ralph Reed. It is not how we would ever seriously title something...it's called "satire."