Political Vine: The Insider's Source on Georgia Politics

Political Vine: The Insider's Source on Georgia Politics

The Political Vine is the home of political news, satire, rants, and rumors.


MEMORANDUM TO: Jay Morgan, Lobbyist Cum Laude

by Bill Simon

RE: I humbly seek your advice

Dear Mr. Morgan,

I am writing to you today for some advice. I know from a lot of my sources down at the capitol that you are one of the most admired lobbyists down there, and when the other lobbyists see you walking down the halls, they just stand aside and make way for you. You know, some of my closest contacts down there have privately admitted to me that they regularly seek out your counsel, which is why I believe you are the best person to contact for help on this particular issue.

A lobbyist acquaintance of mine has confided in me of a rather serious problem he believes he may soon be facing. I cannot get into a lot of details, but this is what the gist of it is: Early this last session, he took it upon himself to make personal visits to all of the Republican legislators, stumping on behalf of Tricia Pridemore for State GOP Party Chair. I’m sure you’re somewhat familiar with this race.

Anyway, it seems this lobbyist acquaintance of mine got a bit overzealous with several of the legislators he talked to. Some of them balked at supporting Tricia, and a few of these legislators emphatically told this lobbyist that they would be supporting Sue Everhart. The lobbyist told them “If you don’t support Tricia Pridemore, we will set-up a PAC and raise a million dollars to run someone against you in the next cycle.”

Well, now that the session is over, this lobbyist friend of mine has gotten word that several of these legislators who were threatened by him have had an conversation with the US Attorney’s office of the Northern District of Georgia. He’s kind of concerned that his threats to these legislators may have actually violated the federal RICO statute dealing with influencing and corruption of a public official.

He is worried sick about what might happen if he has crossed the line on this State GOP race by making threats to get his preferred candidate elected. And, he’s fretting about whether or not he should go ahead and find a criminal defense attorney now, before an FBI agent knocks on his door, or before an “invitation” comes to go appear before a federal grand jury.

Mr. Morgan, what would you advise me to tell him to do? Should he just wait and see what happens, or should he start interviewing criminal defense attorneys?

Thank you so much for any help you can provide me here. My lobbyist acquaintance would be most grateful for any sage advice you can offer him.

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Today's Deep Thought

Instead of a regular arm, Carl had been born with a pigeon's wing. The odd thing was, all through his life, no one had ever laughed at his wing - not even the mean kids at school. Then one day he realized why: He looked in the mirror and saw that HE WAS A PIGEON! He crapped right there, as he often did, wherever he was.



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